A Letter To My Son
Live outside the tangle of fear thinking,
live in silence…… Why do you stay in prison
When the door is wide open — Rumi
June 7, 2023
Dearest Noah,
You are graduating high school.
Leo Tolstoy wrote a wonderful short story called The Three Questions. He wanted to explore what is the best way to live. The three questions were….
- When is the right time to begin everything?
- Who were the right people to listen to, and whom to avoid?
- What was the most important thing to do?
I wonder what you would give to the answers to these three questions. In a way, you are still learning. In many other ways, you already live this. I can’t tell you how often people have approached me and said you greeted them, listened to them, and took the time to be kind to them. How does that relate to the three questions?
As you know, your Mom and I are pretty different. However, that doesn’t mean that one of us is wrong or better or worse. We are just different. These differences made it difficult to live with one another. Yet, these differences were essential to providing balance, stability, and safety for growing and establishing yourself in health. Through all these years, you have had the opportunity to discover your voice, be in wonder and curiosity, and sense your connection to this beautiful earth. In this way, you have organically been discovering the meaning behind these three questions.
You have grown up so fast. I still remember like it was just yesterday when I held you in my arms just after you first decided to enter this world. You were precious and full of life. I could see such intelligence and love in you. I do not just say this; it was evident to me as I took the whole of you in.
You quickly learned to crawl, speak and walk. You loved being outside no matter the weather. You explored and were curious. You had an open mind, yet, you also were stubborn and clear on your purpose.
You were a leader without trying to be one. Your friends looked up to you without knowing exactly why. They could not express what was beyond their comprehension. People have followed you your whole life. The beautiful aspect of this is that this was never forced. You led by being you. This was your gift in soccer. Yes, you are an excellent player. But, it was your leadership that helped bring your team together and win championships.
You love nature and found many ways to explore. I have loved Nordic skiing with you as we get into the quiet flows that can’t be measured. You move with grace and slow us down to peek into nature’s heart and settle there.
You are kind, gentle, and a loving spirit with a wise and intelligent mind. Your journey has just begun, my son.
- Let no one choose your path for you.
- Confront always your fears and do not shy away from challenges.
- Listen first, and ascertain later.
- Do not hold in your pains and suffering. Share with others.
- Meditate into a deep quiet so you can perceive presence beyond knowledge, beyond the limited mind.
- Before you begin to change the world, make sure you know yourself.
- You will be tempted, and people will try and manipulate or coerce you into pleasures that can take you off your path. Slow down, reflect, and see where those paths will take you.
- Dialogue rather than debate.
- Treat all species with respect and kindness.
- Love rather than hate.
- Logic instead of ignorance.
- Empathy and compassion instead of apathy and tolerance.
- Every day, find a way to be in nature.
- Be present with the one you are with.
Noah, you are connected to everything around you, yet you are alone. How is this true? Look, and you will know. The Hero’s Journey is a task for the courageous. This journey will bring you to the light that is yourself and into your darkest places. Do not shy away but embrace for all of it is you. You have tremendous strength and wisdom and such a beautiful mind. In this way, you will know the answers to the three questions.
I am always amazed by you and the life you have already led. I am so excited about your journey and your new adventure to Oregon. I will also miss you terribly and beautifully. I love you, son, more than you will ever know.
Rise to every challenge, live fully, discover Wholeness, and break down the barriers of hierarchy and power. Use love to guide you, and your life will be beautiful if you know the answers to the three questions.
I Love YOU,
Dad
If you can be absolutely comfortable with not knowing who you are, then what’s left is who you are. — Eckhart Tolle
Truth, like gold, is to be obtained not by its growth but by washing away from it all that is not gold. — Leo Tolstoy
When the mind is kept away from it preoccupations, it becomes quiet. A quiet mind is all you need. All else will happen rightly once your mind is quiet. — Sri Nisagadata Maharaj
Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls. — Joseph Campbell
You and I are all as much continuous with the physical universe as a wave is continuous with the ocean. — Alan Watts
Love is the most potent force in the Universe. Love is Wholeness. Because love is whole, love doesn’t crave, does not force, and does not need anything. Love is the binding force of all that is. Love doesn’t conform and is vulnerable. Love is not conditioned. Love flows out of the quiet stillness when the mind is quiet. Love doesn’t try and hide or manipulate. Love isn’t about manifesting or gaining. Love is. — Garin Samuelsen
Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls. — Joseph Campbell
You and I are all as much continuous with the physical universe as a wave is continuous with the ocean. — Alan Watts
Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls. — Joseph Campbell
You and I are all as much continuous with the physical universe as a wave is continuous with the ocean. — Alan Watts
